What does it feel like to be trying to hope?

What does it feel like when you're trying to have hope? It feels like work.

Right now, I'm waiting for direction from God on an issue. I've asked for His help, have told Him I will rely on His hand, and now am trying to have hope. But my difficulty arises when I snatch this problem back from God and try to assemble a solution on my own. Then I remember, "I am waiting for the Lord's direction." I go back and forth between hope and impatience. Every time I have to remind myself that I am relying on God, it feels like mental and emotional work.

That's what trying to have hope feels like for me.